Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand in the Sun and Be Your Own Person

It is May and the Dartmouth College commencement is 10 days away, yet Rhimes has not written the speech. She seeks support from an online women’s forum and learns that standing tall in a “Wonder Woman stance” with her hands on her hips has been proven to positively impact how a woman is viewed by others. Rhimes begins practicing the technique as she works and parents, always fearing that she is falling behind in the “Mommy Scorecard” she keeps in her head.

Gradually, she writes the speech but, as she reads the finished draft, Rhimes decides it sounds inauthentic. She starts over, writing a more raw, less funny, more genuine speech.

When commencement day arrives, Rhimes feels nervous and keeps waiting for the usual fear and panic to set in, but it never does. When she looks out at the audience from the podium, Rhimes experiences a shift. The speech is not about her: It is for and about the graduates. Rhimes delivers the speech without fear.

The speech is reprinted at the end of the chapter. In it, Rhimes reveals her fear of public speaking and is frank about the panic she faced while preparing for it. She confesses that a great deal of her anxiety occurs because the speech will be streamed online and thus critiqued and analyzed by many people.